📅 Wednesday, 6 May 2026 · No. 50

After a Year, She Finally Groomed Her Back

💤 Behavior Diaries · ✎ 4 min · by Azmi in Meknes

Azmi's note My personal log from Meknes, not vet advice. Just what I did and saw tonight.

Nearly a year of waiting and tonight it happened: she leaned in and groomed the other’s head and ears, slow and proper. The other one melted into a puddle and asked for more. This is the waiting chronicle, twelve months in brief entries, then the night itself, minute by minute. Personal bonding joy, not behavior advice; pairs move at their own pace and anything forceful backfires. One direction only for now. She still ignores the hints to return the favour. A queen gets served first.

The twelve-month wait, compressed

Months 1-3: parallel living, separate flops, shared hay tolerated. Months 4-6: first synchronized naps (April), first shared tunnel (May, briefly), first nose-touch without retreat (June, starred). Months 7-9: side-by-side loaves nightly, his grooming invitations (head-bows) ignored 40+ times (counted, the things we do), her occasional single lick followed by walking away (months 8 and 10, false dawns, logged as such). Months 10-11: head-bows answered with sniffs, then stillness. Month 12, tonight: everything. Best comment of the week from a friend: weaponized incompetence, she makes him demonstrate grooming again and again. He zones out, she works, both happy. I call it love with extra steps.

Tonight: 20:04 to 20:31

20:04 he bows the head beside her, invitation forty-something. 20:06 first licks hesitant: two, pause, ear flick from him (permission). 20:08 steady rhythm established: forehead, between ears, right ear base, slow and proper, the full service. 20:15 the groomed one went fully zonked, eyes half closed, melting into a puddle. 20:22 rhythm slows, final ear-tip touch, done. 20:25 no chasing after, just loafing side by side, then both flopped in contact and stayed. Total: 16 minutes of grooming, 12 months of waiting. First licks hesitant, then steady rhythm; the groomed one zonked; no chasing after. I sat frozen the entire time, notebook untouched until 20:35, some moments outrank logging, and the log forgives. One direction only, queen served first. Return favour: pending, hints dropped nightly, ignored royally.

The morning after and the new era

Next morning: she groomed again, 6 minutes, same rhythm, the queen’s encore. Then again three evenings later. The log’s new column (grooming: Y/N) reads Y, N, Y, Y in its first week, a habit forming in real time. His response evolution: puddle (night one), puddle with sigh (night two), pre-emptive head-bow the moment she approaches (night four, learned the cue, clever boy). Return-favour watch continues: hints escalate (head-bows held longer, hopeful), service still one-directional, royal prerogative intact. Friends’ updated commentary: weaponized incompetence confirmed as strategy, she trained him to present perfectly and accepts the tribute nightly. My role downgraded from witness to furniture: both flop against my leg post-grooming now, the session’s venue, honored. Twelve months of waiting, sixteen minutes of grooming, infinite encore. Love with extra steps, served nightly.

What waiting taught (the slow column)

The diary kept a slow column all year: weekly one-line state-of-grooming (none, none, hint, none, false dawn, none…). Reading it now, the honesty stings and sings, 40 ignored invitations logged without bitterness, each head-bow recorded like a small brave flag. Advice-shaped residue for the hopeful: count the invitations, not the refusals; the count proves trying continues. Never intervene, one attempted assisted grooming in month 5 (hands gently guiding, failed instantly, both left, logged as interference, never repeated). Pairs negotiate in private; humans provide hay and witness. The year’s truest entry, month 9: still waiting, still hopeful, hay fresh. It paid off on a random Tuesday at 20:04. Waiting works the way water works: slowly, then all at once.

Encore log: week two of grooming

Week two readings: Y, Y, N (rainy evening, all routines compressed), Y, Y, N, Y. Durations: 6, 11, 0, 8, 14, 0, 9 minutes, the 14-minute session a new record with full ear service plus cheek work. His pre-emptive bows now arrive before she settles (anticipation learned); her acceptance rate 5 of 7 approaches. Return favour: still pending, hints now theatrical (head planted under her chin, held, waiting, ignored with majesty). The asymmetry has its own fans: visitors find the one-way service funnier than mutual would be. Documentary notes: filming attempted twice, both times grooming stopped at the phone’s appearance (camera tax documented, filming abandoned, some things are for witnessing, not recording). Month thirteen opens with the column healthy. The queen grooms; the court watches; the diary glows.

Year-two-of-grooming outlook: mutual service predicted by absolutely nobody, hoped by everybody. The hints grow bolder; the queen grows dewier-eyed (possibly). Spectators welcome nightly at 20:04, bring silence, leave with joy. Twelve months waited, encores now routine, diary glowing on the shelf. Love, with extra steps, on schedule.

Waiting ended; witnessing begins. The queen grooms on.

Sixteen minutes that redeemed twelve months. Encores nightly.

Love with extra steps, served nightly at eight.

Month thirteen opens glowing. The slow column reads Y in a row of Ys, the year’s bravest flags finally lowered. Witnessing beats waiting, but waiting made the witnessing.

Sixteen minutes, twelve months, one queen served. Groomed and glowing. Encore. Nightly. Beloved.

🐰

Written by Azmi

I track my rabbits' diet, weight and naps to see what works. Photos are mine, mess included. Say hi on the contact page.

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