📅 Saturday, 13 June 2026 · No. 83

Five-Minute Flop: The Comfiest Ever Recorded

💤 Behavior Diaries · ✎ 4 min · by Azmi in Meknes

Azmi's note My personal log from Meknes, not vet advice. Just what I did and saw tonight.

Gogo ate his hay and flopped like never before. Usually seconds in that position, tonight five full minutes. Last photo shows him right before: upright, innocent, about to commit. This post certifies the record: previous marks, the record night timed twice, the wellness check, and the leaderboard. Personal record log, not health advice, new or changed rest patterns with appetite changes go to the vet; tonight was pure comfort, logged with joy. The is-he-dead-or-comfortable pose strikes again. Comfortable. Always comfortable. Double take every time.

Previous records (now dethroned)

Record history: 30 seconds (March, first timed flop), 90 seconds (April, post-zoomie), 2 minutes (early May, tile record). Tonight: five full minutes, beating every previous record in this diary by four minutes and thirty seconds. Hitting the hay, literally: post-hay flop at 19:05, settled by 19:06, unmoved till 19:11. Flop record sheet: duration five minutes timed twice (phone timer plus photo timestamps corroborating), position full side with legs out, gone. Wellness check: passed, breathing steady, eyes soft, ear flick at minute 3 (alive, comfortable, unbothered). The double take happened anyway (minute 1, involuntary, traditional).

record five-minute full side flop legs out — Flop, angle two.

flop holding past four minutes timestamped — Five full minutes.

Leaderboard and record conditions

Conditions analysis: full hay dinner completed (fuel), calm warm evening (climate), post-zoomie 40 minutes prior (warmup), tile spot freshly wiped (venue). Replicable? Attempted twice since, 3 minutes and 90 seconds (respectable, unranked). The record joins my flop diary’s hall of fame and the sunset race log (the warmup act). Before-photo tradition continues: upright, innocent, about to commit, the series grows. Comfiest ever, certified: five minutes, timed twice, photographed four times. Record stands; challengers napping.

upright innocent pre-flop last photo — Before: last photo upright.

certified comfiest flop final angle — Comfiest ever, certified.

Record attempts since (the chase)

Attempt log post-record: 3:12 (respectable), 1:40 (interrupted by doorbell, voided with honors), 2:45 (night attempt, dim light, counted generously). Conditions study continues: full hay dinner required (unfueled flops max 90 seconds, data across 8 attempts), calm warm evenings favored (3 of 4 records), post-zoomie window 30-50 minutes optimal (the warmup curve). Venue preparation now standard on record nights: tile wiped, room quiet, camera armed, timer visible. The chase keeps flop hour exciting, every 19:05 carries record potential, every flop gets timed just in case. Previous record holders honored: March 30-seconder (pioneer), April 90-seconder (trailblazer), May 2-minuter (gatekeeper). Five minutes reigns; challengers flop nightly.

Flop appreciation society notes

Society founded tonight (membership: me, unanimous). Charter: time all flops over 1 minute, photograph all over 2, celebrate all over 4. Double-take protocol standardized (involuntary gasp permitted, vet-check only if paired with appetite change, never yet needed). The is-he-dead-or-comfortable pose appreciation: universal among flop owners surveyed (sample: friends, unanimous). Comfort indicators ranked: legs out (gold), ear flop asymmetry (silver), sigh on landing (platinum, rare). Tonight’s record scored gold plus sigh, platinum-adjacent, filed accordingly. Comfiest ever, certified twice over, society adjourned to watch the sleeping champion. Flop on, Gogo.

Record-keeping honors: the flop sheet now tracks attempts, conditions, and durations in three columns (modeled on the weigh-in ledger, best practices travel). Timer discipline: visible timer on record nights (accountability), photo timestamps as backup (redundancy), witness signatures (my wife, co-certifier). Seasonal outlook: summer heat may shorten flops (cool tile compensates, venue advantage), autumn cool should extend them (record season predicted). Five minutes stands as the mark; the society watches nightly. Before-photos continue: upright, innocent, about to commit, the series outlives every record. Comfiest ever today; comfier tomorrow, possibly. Flop watch never sleeps (unlike Gogo, five minutes at a time).

Society announcements: membership open (requirement: one timed flop over a minute), meetings nightly 19:05 (tile side, bring camera), dues payable in parsley (to the flopper, not the society). Chapter houses forming (two friends timing flops now, movement growing). Record challenges issued quarterly; sportsmanship mandatory; double-takes universal. Five minutes: the mark, the myth, the sleeping champion. Gogo, flopped legend. Society adjourned to observe.

Timer retired for the night: record safe, society proud, champion sleeping. Five minutes today; dreams tonight; attempts tomorrow. The tile holds the warmth; the diary holds the numbers. Flop watch standing by till 19:05. Gogo reigns; stopwatch rests.

Society records sealed for the month: attempts logged, conditions noted, champion undisturbed. Next record window: autumn cool (predicted favorable). Stopwatch oiled; camera charged; tile waiting. Five minutes bows to no challenger yet. Flop eternal.

Record board updated in pencil (records fall; pencil erases). Challenger scouting: post-zoomie evenings favored, full dinners required, calm weather preferred. Next attempt tonight 19:05 sharp. Timer visible; camera armed; champion napping. Five minutes or bust.

Flop watch standing by. Timer ready; champion resting.

Record stands five minutes; challengers flop nightly regardless.

Comfiest ever, certified twice, challenged nightly.

Five minutes reigns; society watches; Gogo naps.

Comfiest ever today; challengers tomorrow. Flop watch eternal.

Five-minute flop; eternal record. Society adjourned to observe.

Challenger scouting report, this week: post-zoomie flop hit 3:40 (closest yet), post-dinner flop 2:10 (respectable), rainy-day marathon 4:20 (so close the timer was double-checked). The record draws nearer challengers as flop season peaks. Five minutes stands, but the field deepens nightly. Timer ready; society watching; Gogo blissfully unaware of the mounting pressure.

🐰

Written by Azmi

I track my rabbits' diet, weight and naps to see what works. Photos are mine, mess included. Say hi on the contact page.

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