📅 Thursday, 18 June 2026 · No. 87

Not a Devil Bunny (Probably): My Wife Is Obsessed

💤 Behavior Diaries · ✎ 4 min · by Azmi in Meknes

Azmi's note My personal log from Meknes, not vet advice. Just what I did and saw tonight.

His name is Emilio and no, he is not a devil bunny. My wife’s favourite thing in the whole world, red-eye glow and all. I have my doubts some evenings. Tonight the court convenes: prosecution (the glow, the stare, the 3am silhouette), defense (maximum cuddliness, angel naps, parsley manners), verdict at the end. Personal comedy log, not behavior analysis. I do not believe me either. Emilio remains innocent until proven guilty, which will be never.

Prosecution exhibits: the case for devilry

Exhibit A: the red-eye glow, flash photos catch the ruby reflection, and one 3am hallway sighting (him sitting upright in darkness, eyes catching the night-light) ended my bathroom trip early. Exhibit B: the stare, duration unsettling, logged nightly; unbroken eye contact through entire TV episodes (see the screening-room log for corroboration). Exhibit C: the silhouette, loaf on the stairs backlit at dusk, horns of ears outlined, household gasped. Stare duration: unsettling, logged nightly, average 4 minutes. Cuddliness: maximum, contradictory, the defense’s problem and my comfort. Cannot blame her one bit. Devil eyes, angel naps, the prosecution rests its paradox.

Defense: cuddliness, naps, manners

Counter-exhibits: lap naps nightly (a devil would scheme, not snore), parsley manners impeccable (takes gently, never grabs), flop frequency angelic (see the flop records, comfort, not conspiracy). Witness testimony: my wife (favourite thing in the whole world, biased, adored), the thump log (zero thumps on record, devils thump, Emilio naps). Verdict: definitely maybe not a devil, acquitted on all counts, remanded to the couch for cuddling. I have my doubts some evenings (the 3am silhouette lingers in memory). Doubts overruled nightly by snoring. Case closed; appeal window eternal; innocence permanent.

Devilry incidents: the complete file

Incident log, full year: the 3am hallway silhouette (fright rating 8/10, explanation: night-light plus sitting bunny), the red-eye flash photo (fright 6/10, explanation: tapetum lucidum, vet-confirmed normal at a checkup, filed), the stair silhouette at dusk (fright 9/10, explanation: backlit ears plus imagination), the midnight thump with no cause found (fright 5/10, explanation pending, cold case). Stare duration: unsettling, logged nightly, longest unbroken: 11 minutes (TV finale, shared viewing). Each incident resolved same-night by cuddles (the universal solvent). My doubts cluster at night and dissolve by morning flop, pattern logged, fear filed as fondness. Emilio remains innocent: the evidence proves glowing eyes and a loving heart coexist.

Wife’s testimony and household verdict

My wife’s favourite thing in the whole world, testimony: chose him for the calm (correct), keeps him for the cuddles (abundant), defends him against my devil theories nightly (devoted). Cannot blame her one bit, exhibit: last Tuesday’s 20-minute lap nap with synchronized breathing (witnessed, photographed, framed). Devil eyes, angel naps, the household’s official description, unanimous. Coexistence protocol: eerie moments laughed about same-night (fear has a 10-minute expiry here), cuddliness banked daily. Verdict upheld on appeal (my appeal, denied, lovingly). Definitely maybe not a devil: the ruling stands, the naps continue, the glow remains gorgeous. Court of the couch adjourned.

Devilry debate club, household chapter: meeting monthly, cases reviewed, verdicts upheld. New business: the midnight water-drink glow (eyes caught mid-sip, spooky, logged), the sneeze that sounded exactly like a chuckle (unsettling, beloved). Old business: stair silhouette (still reigning fright champion), red-eye photos (explained, still dramatic). Membership: household all plus two converted skeptics (friends, shown the lap naps, convinced). Dues: paid in parsley to the defendant. Emilio presiding (napping through proceedings), wife defending (favourite thing, always), me prosecuting half-heartedly (my doubts dissolve by morning flop). Definitely maybe not a devil, ruling permanent, appeals welcome, naps promised.

Nightly closing arguments: prosecution rests on glow (admitted gorgeous), defense rests on naps (admitted angelic), jury naps through deliberation (verdict by flop). Emilio sleeps; the court sleeps; the diary records dreams (his: parsley fields, probably). Devilry docket empty; cuddle docket full. Innocent, beloved, glowing faintly red in flash photos. Case closed nightly; love affirmed constantly.

Devilry archives, deep storage: kitten-era photos (innocent, tiny, glowing even then), first stare logged (week two, 2 minutes, promising), first 3am silhouette (month two, household screamed, bunny napped). The file grows precisely because the subject stays innocent, every eerie frame needs its cuddle chaser. Archival policy: scares kept, context attached (nap photo stapled to each fright). Complete record: spooky plus sweet, forever paired. Emilio: frightening rarely, loving constantly.

Devilry denied nightly; cuddliness affirmed constantly. Glow gorgeous; naps angelic. Emilio: innocent, beloved, glowing. Court adjourned permanently; couch claimed eternally.

Definitely maybe not a devil; certainly an angel.

Prosecution rests; defense naps; verdict stands. Innocent, glowing, beloved.

Glow science and household poll

The red-eye glow, explained at a routine checkup: light reflecting from the back of the eye (vet’s words, filed), photography physics, not hellfire. Shown the flash photo, the vet laughed kindly and pointed at the same effect in the clinic cat. Household poll on devilry: wife votes innocent (biased, correct), brother votes suspicious (cites 3am silhouette), diary votes beloved (unanimous). Polls close nightly with cuddles; results certified by flop. Glow explained, stare logged, naps worshipped. Emilio: optically demonic, actually angelic.

🐰

Written by Azmi

I track my rabbits' diet, weight and naps to see what works. Photos are mine, mess included. Say hi on the contact page.

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