Diary · Behavior Diaries · Staring Contest: Pooling Braincells for World Domination

📅 Thursday, 4 June 2026 · No. 75

Staring Contest: Pooling Braincells for World Domination

💤 Behavior Diaries · ✎ 4 min · by Azmi in Meknes

Azmi's note My personal log from Meknes, not vet advice. Just what I did and saw tonight.

Caught all three in a staring contest tonight. Psychic communication? Brain cell recharge? All of one and a half braincells pooled together for something big. Tonight’s post is the summit minutes: attendees, agenda theories, photographic evidence, adjournment. Personal comedy log, not behavior analysis. Whatever the plan is, I am probably funding it. World domination starts with parsley.

Meeting minutes: session 12

Attendees: all three, no absences, full quorum for the sixth straight night
Agenda: unknown, possibly snacks, proposals heard: hay quality review, flop-spot allocation, my bedtime (unfair item, tabled by me)
Outcome: adorable, adjourned for hay, motion carried unanimously, executed immediately

Three photos, three angles, zero blinking detected. The summit reconvenes nightly, 19:40 sharp, rug center, formation triangle. Precedent file: my wrong-answers town hall (single-stare edition) and the thump log’s case files (what happens when summits displease). Funding report: parsley budget up 10% since summits began (bribes work on all governments). The braincell, one and a half, pooled, achieves more per minute than most committees per quarter. World domination proceeds on schedule; financing approved (mine, unwillingly, lovingly).

three rabbits in staring triangle formation — Stare, second angle.

wide shot of braincell summit rug center — Braincell summit, wide shot.

Summit history: past sessions

Session 1 (first noticed): two attendees, 3 minutes, dismissed as coincidence. Session 5: full trio first observed, triangle formation noted. Session 8: first photographic evidence (blurry, kept). Tonight: session 12, full protocol, both cameras ready. Duration trend: 2 minutes (early) to 11 minutes (tonight’s record), summits lengthen with practice. Agenda theories across sessions: snack quality review (leading theory, 5 votes), flop-spot allocation (3 votes), my bedtime (tabled repeatedly, my filibuster holding), world domination (standing item, never resolved). Zero blinking detected across all photographed sessions, the summit’s most unsettling statistic (12 sessions, 40+ frames, 1 blink suspected, unconfirmed). Whatever the plan is, operational security is excellent.

Funding and adjournment protocols

Funding: parsley per attendee per session (3 sprigs nightly, budgeted), bonus flower heads for sessions over 10 minutes (tonight qualified). I am probably funding it, the diary’s financial lapse, happily uncorrected. The summit reconvenes nightly: 19:40, rug center, triangle up. Adjournment: hay deployment ends all sessions within 2 minutes (tested 12 of 12, hay beats conspiracy, every time). Minutes filed same-evening, photos archived by angle, braincell count reaffirmed (one and a half, pooled, sufficient). World domination starts with parsley; parsley starts with me; I start the hay. The circle, like the triangle, is complete. Summit adjourned; summit eternal.

Opposition and press coverage

Opposition party (me, minority of one): motions to reveal the agenda (defeated 3-0 nightly), bedtime enforcement (tabled indefinitely), snack-budget oversight (overruled by cuteness). Press coverage: my photos, three angles nightly, published here with zero editorial interference (attempted captions rejected by subjects, photos run caption-free per summit preference… except the captions below, negotiated). Summit press pool: me, silent, doorway. Leaks: none in 12 sessions (discipline exemplary). Public statements: none issued (the stare speaks). Approval ratings: 100% across all polled humans (sample: household, unanimous). The summit governs adorably and unwatched, except watched nightly by me, the embedded correspondent. World domination proceeds; parsley flows; minutes filed. Correspondent signing off from the rug’s edge.

Summit season review: 12 sessions minuted, 0 agendas revealed, 40+ frames filed, 1 blink suspected. Funding total: 36 sprigs of parsley (worth every stare). Outcomes delivered: adorable (12/12), hay consumed (all sessions), world domination (pending, on schedule). Correspondent’s note: embedding with the summit remains the diary’s best assignment, front-row stillness, nightly wonder, braincell-adjacent living. Next season: same time, same rug, same triangle. The minutes will be kept; the agenda will stay sealed; the parsley will flow. Adjourned sine die, reconvened nightly.

Midnight session bonus content: session 13 convened late (moonlight through hallway, lighting cinematic), agenda expanded to include blanket allocation (resolved: shared), adjournment delayed by mutual grooming observed mid-summit (business and pleasure combined). Funding bonus authorized (flower heads, historic session). Minutes longest yet; wonder deepest yet. The summit outdoes itself precisely when unobserved… except observed (correspondent present, silent, honored). Nightly forever.

Summit economies of scale: three attendees, one braincell, infinite output. Per-capita adorableness highest in the diary. Efficiency admired; parsley expensed; wonder compounded nightly. Triangle complete, circle unbroken, minutes eternal.

Summit dispatch, tonight: triangle formed 19:40 sharp, agenda sealed, parsley deployed. Duration 11 minutes (record tied), blinks zero (streak alive), adjournment by hay (unanimous). Minutes filed; wonder banked. Correspondent’s pay: front-row joy, nightly. World domination: funded, scheduled, adorable. Parsley budget reviewed; increase approved without debate.

Summit eternal: triangle up, agenda sealed, hay deployed. Minutes filed nightly; wonder never adjourns.

Twelve sessions minuted, zero agendas revealed, forty frames filed. Funding: parsley. Outcomes: adorable. Correspondent embedded; wonder compounded; triangle eternal. Parsley flows; minutes last.

Summit adjourned nightly; reconvened nightly. Parsley approved; wonder filed; triangle holds.

One and a half braincells, pooled nightly, sufficient for world domination and snacks.

Funding report: parsley up, wonder up, blinks zero. Summit solvent; domination scheduled.

Triangle complete, circle unbroken, minutes eternal. Parsley flows nightly.

Session thirteen convenes tomorrow night with fresh parsley funding and the same triangular formation on the rug. Whatever grand scheme they approve, my diary will minute it faithfully and my wallet will sponsor it.

🐰

Written by Azmi

I track my rabbits' diet, weight and naps to see what works. Photos are mine, mess included. Say hi on the contact page.

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